I was visiting my sister and her husband one night and my brother-in-law Mike offered me a drink. I saw that he had a bottle of bourbon on the kitchen counter, and I don't drink alcohol. So I said, "No, thanks, I don't think so." He looked surprised and said, "Are you sure? Just one? I should give you something." I said, "Do you have any diet pop?" And he brightened up and said, "Sure. We've got Coke and Vernor's. Which would you like?" I said "Vernor's would be good." I forgot all about it then and went into the living room to visit with my sister. Mike brought me a glass with ice and an amber-colored liquid in it, which I assumed was Vernor's-just Vernor's, that is. I thought I had asked for a diet pop to drink. I drank quite a bit of it before I realized it tasted too good for Vernor's alone and the effect I was getting, sort of warm and pleasant, wouldn't come from diet soda. He had added bourbon to it. When I asked him about it, he was very surprised. He thought I wanted bourbon mixed with Vernor's.
             Obviously, in this case a miscommunication took place. I wanted Vernor's by itself, but I got it with alcohol. It was an unusual thing for a misunderstanding to take place between him and me, as we get along very well and have had many, many long talks. There was distraction, however, because the kids were coming in and out and asking for things, the dog was barking, and the TV set was on. I intended to let him know I didn't want any alcohol to drink, but I never actually said it. I was trying to be pleasant, so maybe I wasn't assertive enough. I assumed he knew I don't drink alcohol. But maybe he thought I had changed my mind. At any rate, I was the one who failed to communicate clearly. By not saying, "I don't want any alcohol," he got the wrong message.
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